Question
Hi,
A couple of times now, my partner has had a serious sleep problem, but I really don't know what it is.
The last time was a couple of days ago. He had been up until about 6:30am drinking with a friend. He'd probably had about 25 standard drinks since 10:30pm the night before. I had to wake him up for work - he was supposed to start at 8:00am. I tried to wake him at about 7:30am. At first, he said it was ok, and that he'd go to work late. I started to get a bit annoyed, and said that it he only had 1/2 an hour to get to work, and that he had to be there at 8:00am. He started getting really angry, and told me he started work at 3:00pm (which was just plain wrong). He got more angry when I told him he was wrong, and told me he would break up with me if I said he started at 8:00 again. I yelled at him, thinking he wasn't properly awake, and he poked me really hard in my side - we sometimes poke each other gently, just in fun, but he's never hurt me like that before. I started crying, and he began to yell at me, telling me that it didn't hurt, and I was putting it on. I began yelling at him, and hitting him, trying to make him wake up and he kicked me really hard. He yelled something about me 'going around the corner and getting my friends'.... which had no relevance whatsoever to what was happening.
I left the room and got a water sprayer, thinking that would surely wake him up. When I got back to the room, he seemed to be sleeping again. I started spraying his face, and he began to yell at me, again saying he would break up with me if I kept doing it. I started yelling again, saying he needed to get up. He then said: "game shooting is different to rabbit shooting. If you come back to bed, I'll explain it to you". Again, this had absolutely no relevance to what was happening, although he went shooting with a friend about a week beforehand, and I was a bit upset about it at the time.
I went and got someone else, who came to our room, said a few words to him, and he woke up. He had no memory of what had happened, and felt scared for a little bit afterwards.
Similar things have happened before. When I've tried to wake him he gets really angry, yells, and talks nonsense, and is scared when I finally get him to wake up. This has happened either when he's had a lot to drink that night, or when he's had very little sleep, or both.
He said his mum used to sleep walk and make sandwitches in her sleep. She also used to get night terrors. I've never seen my partner sleep walk, or seen any evidence that he has done, and he's never shown any evidence of night terrors, so I'm really stumped for what this problem might be.
The main issue is that he really hurt me this last time, so I'd like to know what the problem might be, and if there is any way to treat/prevent this from happening again.
Answer
What he could be having are hypnangogic hallucinations, the brain and the body are supposed to awaken together and go to sleep, but sometimes this is a nano second lapse so one is dreaming with ones eyes open. Dreams are very vivid and scary, however, the angry in his situation my guess is due to much alcohol. It affects people differently. My first answer is for him to stop drinking. Also 3 hours before bedtime stay away from caffeine, tea, coffee, alcohol, chocolate, exercise , caramel colored soda like coke , pepsi, and gingerale. all this make for restless sleep. l5 minutes before bedtime he should take a glass of warm milk. Milk when heated contains tryptophan a natural amino acid sleep inducer so a glass may do the trick, if it persists and his daytime alertness is being afffected he needs to see a sleep center. but right now my guess is that his alcohol related. feel free to email again karel
